I’ve been thinking of disruptors and my personal life.
Children as disruptors.
Tree falling on my house as disruptor.
Aging parent moving to town as disruptor.
It’s the time of disruption. We live in an era of disruption. I work in a business that it being disrupted. And you have to find a way out.
A new way of living. You have to adapt or go extinct.
With my kids, I was ready to be a new person. I was tired of dinner parties and work parties and standing in people’s backyards, smoking. I was ready to be a new person, socially, at least.
The disruption with the tree business has been mostly resolved. I worry another tree will fall on our house in a strong storm. I don’t feel safe. And I don’t love the house as much as I used to.
My mom has been the biggest disruptor. I keep trying to adapt. I keep trying to fix it. But it’s one failed project after another.
I helped her get a job but she didn’t like it so she quit.
I helped her get a therapist but she didn’t like it so she quit.
I asked her to pick up the kids after school once a week. But she didn’t like it so she quit.
We tried to move her back to Wisconsin, but she panicked at the last minute and quit.
My sister got her a laptop, she won’t use it.
I helped her sign up for classes, she didn’t like them and quit.
Eventually, I stopped trying. You can only invest your energy in a project for so long until you see some return.
I still invite her over to the house. I cook her dinner on the weekends. I don’t know how she fills her days when she’s not with us. I think she sleeps all the time and watches TV. It is not good, it’s not what I wanted for her.
And now I just think: how does a disruption end?